1. Tutorial
Deaths 0
Coins 0
Time 0.0
Cohen Crash✕

Cohen Crash has stopped responding.

Jaden touched something. The game is still running, it just doesn't want to talk about it. Play around this window.

Cohen's mom, cheering

Announcer: Freddie Crespo (Papa Crescendo)

COHEN CRASH

A platformer that keeps breaking on purpose. Cohen runs, jumps, and dies a lot. Allen, Jaden, Swanson, Peter, Josh, Zac LeBlanc, Destin Pickle, Brian and Josiah are the enemies. Allen and Jaden are the worst ones. Glenn and Lanie Sandridge are in the cave. Do not go in the cave. The exes are worse. Barkley is a good boy. Mom is on the sideline and she is not leaving. Set at Orangewood Christian School, mostly. Every level cheats in a different way, and a few of them are different games entirely. The deaths counter is permanent and public.

Keys: arrows or WASD, space to jump. On phones and iPads, on-screen buttons. Phones work in portrait or landscape. Lifetime deaths: 0 · Wallet: 0 coins · Best run: 0

Levels

Beat one to unlock the next. Best time and death count are saved so the shame is permanent.

Name the enemies

The two faces from the photo are the bosses. Change who they are if I guessed wrong. Allen, Swanson, Peter, Josh, Jaden and Brian are already in as enemies, signs and credits.

Jeremy Sandefur's Store

Jeremy Sandefur sells powers. Coins come from levels and Endless runs. Powers are permanent. Jeremy does not do refunds, questions, or eye contact. Wallet: 0

Run over.

Rounds
Score
Coins banked
Best score

Level cleared

Time
Deaths
Coins
Best time